- I spent too much time worrying about…
- I spent too little time doing things such as…
- If I could go back in time, then what I would do differently from today onwards is…
- A value is a direction that we desire to keep moving in whereas a goal is a desired outcome that can be achieved or completed. For example, if you desire a college degree, that’s a goal and this goal is in service of the value of being “well educated.”
- Values are ends in themselves while goals are a means to an end – in service of the values.
- Values, by definition, cannot be achieved and maintained in a static state and don’t have an end point. Goals, on the other hand, have an object-like outcome that can be "checked off" a to-do list.
- If a person doesn’t meet a desired goal, they can still stay true to their values. For example, if a person doesn’t get a college degree, they can still pursue enough education in line with their value of being “well educated.”
- For an individual to live a valued life, they must consistently engage with their values leading to ongoing valued actions even when a particular goal linked to that value is accomplished. For example, if you want to be a kind person, you may consider doing some random acts of kindness. However, once that act of kindness is done (goal accomplished), your value of being kind doesn’t cease and you may find other ways to live your value.
- Values are always available for you to act on by way of manipulating the quality and process part of an ongoing action whereas there is no guarantee that a goal will always be available because you may already achieved it or it may not be achievable. To illustrate this, being loving and caring is a value while getting married is a goal. You don’t have to be married to live your values of being loving and caring as you can work on these values towards other people in your life, including family, friends, pets, and yourself.
One way to find out the difference between values and goals is to ask your underlying thoughts, actions, or feelings, “What is this in service of?” Another related question is relevant if you are avoiding certain things, “If I weren’t doing …(avoided situation, feeling, or thought), what would I be doing that would tell me that I were living a more valuable life? These questions will also help you thresh out a goal disguised as a pseudovalue. For example, a person may value being wealthy. But wealth is valuable as it makes it possible for other values to be pursued such as security for oneself and family. The hidden value here is caring for self and family.
To summarize, both values and goals are important in your pursuit of a meaningful life. While goals are akin to a destination, values provide you with a roadmap or compass to reach that destination and also determine what kind of a traveler you want to be on this journey. In other words, values guide you in how you want to approach your destination - with curiosity, kindness, and other values close to your heart. If your goals are value-based, you are less likely to experience what is called "success depression." This state epitomizes the disconnect that one feels between one's present accomplishments and one's core values wherein despite "having it all," (e.g., successful career, stable relationships, healthy children, etc.), one still struggles with depression and views one's accomplishments as hollow (Zettle, 2007).
To learn more about evidence-based self-management techniques that promote mental health and well-being, check out Dr. Duggal's Author Page.
HARPREET S. DUGGAL, MD, FAPA
REFERENCES
Harris, R. (2008). The happiness trap. Boston, MA: Trumpeter Books.Harris, R. (2009). ACT made simple. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.
Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2012). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change. (2nd ed.). New York, NY: The Guildford Press.
Zettle, R. D. (2007). ACT for depression. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.
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