Self-Management of Depression

Anger is a normal emotion that we all experience in our daily lives. Not all anger is bad; it can help you focus on self-defense, mastery, and control, especially when you perceive that your goals are being blocked (Linehan, 2015). But anger can also become problematic if it is disproportionate to the triggering situation, leads to aggression or destruction, or occurs too frequently. People differ in how they express anger. What may make one individual angry may not be perceived as anger-provoking by another individual. In Aristotle's words, which ring true even today, "Anybody can become angry-that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way-that is not within everybody's power and is not easy."  While it may not always be possible to predict when one may get angry, trying to understand the reasons behind this variation in the expression of anger would help one become mor...

We experience anger when our unrealistic demands, conceptualized in our minds as “should” or “must,” are unmet. Examples include, “I should work harder,” “People should treat me fairly,” “You must do what I tell you to do,” “I shouldn’t be angry,” etc. “Should” and “must” thinking arises from moralistic rules or perfectionistic demands to which we hold ourselves and others. Irrational "should" statements rest on one's assumption that one is entitled to instant gratification. However, being what it is, life does not respect your “shoulds” or “musts.” Moreover, no law says we should get what we want, any more than other people always get what they want. How do you handle the “shoulds”? 1. Eliminate the words “should” and “must” when talking about expectations and replace them with “I hope,” or “I wish,” or “I prefer.” For example, “I wish things were different,” “I hope I can do well, but I can tolerate not being perfect,” “I wish things were different,” etc. In co...

Anger, irritability, and frustration may not be the core symptoms of major depression in adults, but almost 50% of people with major depression experience these symptoms (Fava et al., 2010; Judd et al., 2013). In addition, irritability may be the main presentation of mood in children and adolescents with depression. Having irritability and anger while being depressed is a double whammy. Overt irritability and anger during an episode of major depression are associated with greater severity of depression, longer duration of the episode of depression, poorer impulse control, a more chronic and severe long-term course of depression, higher rates of lifetime substance use and anxiety disorder, and greater psychosocial impairment (Judd et al., 2013). When feeling depressed, you may be masking your more vulnerable feelings of hurt, guilt, shame, grief, or fear with anger or irritability. Depression causes the emotions that make you feel more vulnerable not come to the surface, ...