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Reflections on Self: The Observing Ego Exercise


It is difficult not to judge yourself or others or overanalyze a situation when going through challenging times. Strong emotions emerging from the cognitive processes of judging or analyzing prevent you from using your rational mind to arrive at solutions to solve a problem or use mindful acceptance if the problem is unsolvable. In these circumstances, observing ego, a skill used in many mindfulness practices, helps you increase your self-awareness and allows you to perceive an adverse event non-judgmentally. 

The word “ego” in observing ego refers to your healthy, rational, logical, and compassionate self. An important function of the ego is the capacity for self-observation. This is your ability to monitor or reflect upon your feelings, impulses, and thoughts rather than impulsively acting on them (Glickauf-Hughes et al., 1996). While your thoughts, images, feelings, sensations, and physical body change, your observing ego, also called the observing self, remains the same (Harris, 2008). When you focus your attention on a thought or feeling and as you notice it, the awareness of it is the observing ego. The steps for this technique are as follows (Glickauf-Hughes et al., 1996; Graham, 2013):
  1. Identify a recent adversity that is still unresolved. It could be dealing with unpaid bills, financial issues, relationship problems, work issues, etc.
  2. If unrelated thoughts and emotions bother you, step back from them using statements like, "My mind is telling me to feel...or think...Thanks, mind." 
  3. Bring on your “observing ego” and reflect on the issue. Be cognizant of your thoughts, feelings, and body sensations.
  4. Allow yourself to experience these thoughts, feelings, and body sensations without using one of the six "control" strategies: dwelling, judging, avoiding, analyzing, suppressing, or trying to get rid of them.
  5. Ask yourself these two questions: "What story am I telling myself?” This is the personal narrative you have created to explain a particular situation. “What would I think if this happened to my best friend?”
  6. Observe any emerging patterns of thoughts or coping strategies that you default to in situations like these.
This exercise helps you gain a better perspective on your problem by allowing you to consciously feel more detached from the problem's overpowering thoughts and emotions and have a more objective view.

Check out Dr. Duggal’s Author Page to learn more about evidence-based self-management techniques that promote mental health and well-being.
 

HARPREET S. DUGGAL, MD, FAPA

REFERENCES

Glickauf-Hughes, C., Wells, M., & Chance, S. (1996). Techniques for strengthening clients’ observing ego. Psychotherapy, 33(3), 431-440.

Graham, L. (2013). Bouncing back. New World Library.

Harris, R. (2008). The happiness trap. Trumpeter Books.
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